Toddler Afraid Of The Dark? 7 Essential Steps To Take NOW.

Author Image By Paula McLaren - Norland Nurse NNEB RSH •  Updated: 02/25/24 •  Sleep / Sleep Tips

Is your toddler afraid of the dark? Do you suspect they might be? Are bedtimes emotional and clingy?

A toddler’s fear of the dark is not a small thing. It needs to be handled correctly so your little one can sleep peacefully once again.

If you want your toddler to overcome this fear and reclaim your evenings, here’s exactly what you must do.

Toddler Afraid Of The Dark Featured

What Causes A Toddler’s Fear Of The Dark?

At What Age Do Children Become Afraid Of The Dark?

Around the age of 2, toddlers often become afraid of the dark as a result of their powerful imaginations and ability to learn new concepts.

Some children can experience a fear of the dark earlier than this, but it’s not common. 

Between the ages of 2 and 6 years old, a fear of the dark is most likely to occur.

Why Do Some Toddlers Suddenly Become Afraid Of The Dark?

Your toddler’s fear of the dark is a common part of their development and usually begins as their imagination becomes more active.

This developmental milestone can make bedtime stories seem very real to them, and the darkness may fill their mind with worry.

However, when this fear occurs suddenly, it is usually because it’s been triggered by a big change that has recently occurred in your toddler’s life. Starting daycare, the arrival of a sibling, or moving house are the major changes that can cause your toddler to become afraid of the dark.

Your toddler can also develop a fear of the dark suddenly by recently experiencing a nightmare or a night terror. To learn more about handling toddler nightmares and night terrors, read these posts:

Signs Your Toddler Is Developing A Fear Of The Dark

Sometimes your toddler may not be able to vocalise their fear of the dark and it may show itself in indirect behaviours. Signs to watch out for are:

If your toddler is showing any of these signs they are likely developing a fear of the dark which will need to be addressed with lots of loving care and support.

How Can You Help A Toddler Afraid Of The Dark?

If your toddler is showing signs of fear of the dark it’s essential to offer loving comfort and support. Here are my top tips for helping toddlers feel safe at night again:

7 Ways To Help A Toddler Who Is Afraid Of The Dark
  1. Recognize and validate their feelings to ensure they feel heard. Never mock or dismiss your toddler’s fear of the dark as this can cause more distress and anxiety. Your understanding will go a long way towards helping your toddler gain confidence and learn how to manage their fears.
  2. Having a recognizable and consistent bedtime routine. A predictable routine will help create a sense of safety that your toddler can find comfort in in the lead-up to bedtime and lights out. The bedtime routine should happen at the same time every night, even on weekends.
  3. Using a night light can provide a sense of control over the environment and alleviate some of your toddler’s fear of the dark. I particularly like this night light projector.
  4. Positive reinforcement for bravery can encourage nighttime fear coping skills. Praise your toddler’s efforts to stay calm and offer cuddles to reinforce comfort.
  5. Introduce comfort items like a favorite stuffed toy, to help your toddler self-soothe. These items can become reliable companions in the night, aiding in overcoming their fear of the dark
  6. Be prepared to check for monsters to assure your toddler that no scary beasts are lurking in the dark. Especially under beds, in cupboards, and behind doors. Creating a monster spray by filling a spray bottle with water, sequins and a few drops of essential oils (lavender and camomile work well as they’re relaxing scents) can help with the illusion. You can even get your toddler to decorate the bottle so it’s extra potent!
  7. Use books to talk about your toddler’s fear of the dark and monsters under the bed with relatable characters that they can identify with who are experiencing the same fear as them. Here are some of my favorites: 
Orion and the Dark
Franklin in the Dark
Tiny T.Rex and the Very Very Dark
Billy Monster's Daymare
5.0
4.6
4.8
4.6

Join Orion on an imaginative adventure through the world of the dark! In this beautifully illustrated children's book, author Emma Yarlett explores the concept of fear and how we can overcome it. Follow Orion as he learns to face his fears and discovers the magic and wonder that can be found in the dark. With engaging storytelling and stunning illustrations, "Orion and the Dark" is a must-read for children and parents alike.

I love Franklin stories and this book is no exception. In this story, poor little Franklin discovers he's afraid of the dark.

This is particularly distressing for Franklin as he happens to be a turtle, and the darkness he fears is, of course, inside his own shell. Bravely, with shell in tow, he sets forth to seek help and in the course of his travels discovers a bird who is afraid of heights, a polar bear who is afraid of the cold, and even a hydrophobic duck. In the end, Franklin discovers that everybody is afraid of something, even his own mother, and his response to what he has learned is guaranteed to draw a smile.

Tiny T-Rex and the Very Dark Dark is a delightful and relatable book that helps children overcome their fear of the dark. Through the lovable character of Tiny T-Rex, children will learn that even the bravest of us can feel scared sometimes and that it's okay to ask for help! With its charming illustrations and empowering message, Tiny T-Rex and the Very Dark Dark is a must-read for any toddler who needs a little extra courage at bedtime.

Billy Monster's Daymare by Alan Durant is a fantastic children's book that addresses the common fear of the dark uniquely and playfully.

The story centers around Billy, a young monster who fears the daylight in the same way that human children might fear the dark. Billy's anxiety about the day is presented in a manner that is relatable to toddlers who have nighttime fears. Through engaging illustrations and a comforting narrative, the book helps children understand that their fears are normal and can be overcome!

Orion and the Dark
5.0

Join Orion on an imaginative adventure through the world of the dark! In this beautifully illustrated children's book, author Emma Yarlett explores the concept of fear and how we can overcome it. Follow Orion as he learns to face his fears and discovers the magic and wonder that can be found in the dark. With engaging storytelling and stunning illustrations, "Orion and the Dark" is a must-read for children and parents alike.

Franklin in the Dark
4.6

I love Franklin stories and this book is no exception. In this story, poor little Franklin discovers he's afraid of the dark.

This is particularly distressing for Franklin as he happens to be a turtle, and the darkness he fears is, of course, inside his own shell. Bravely, with shell in tow, he sets forth to seek help and in the course of his travels discovers a bird who is afraid of heights, a polar bear who is afraid of the cold, and even a hydrophobic duck. In the end, Franklin discovers that everybody is afraid of something, even his own mother, and his response to what he has learned is guaranteed to draw a smile.

Tiny T.Rex and the Very Very Dark
4.8

Tiny T-Rex and the Very Dark Dark is a delightful and relatable book that helps children overcome their fear of the dark. Through the lovable character of Tiny T-Rex, children will learn that even the bravest of us can feel scared sometimes and that it's okay to ask for help! With its charming illustrations and empowering message, Tiny T-Rex and the Very Dark Dark is a must-read for any toddler who needs a little extra courage at bedtime.

Billy Monster's Daymare
4.6

Billy Monster's Daymare by Alan Durant is a fantastic children's book that addresses the common fear of the dark uniquely and playfully.

The story centers around Billy, a young monster who fears the daylight in the same way that human children might fear the dark. Billy's anxiety about the day is presented in a manner that is relatable to toddlers who have nighttime fears. Through engaging illustrations and a comforting narrative, the book helps children understand that their fears are normal and can be overcome!

Helping An Older Child Who Is Afraid Of The Dark

While the age at which toddlers usually first start to exhibit fear of the dark is normally around 2 years of age… older children who have previously not been afraid of the dark may develop a fear at a later stage.

However, the age of your child will determine how you handle the fear. Here’s what to do:

Helping A 3-Year-Old Who Is Afraid Of The Dark

At 3 years old, a child’s fears can become very vivid. They have a more developed vocabulary and will explain to you how they are feeling and what they are scared of.

Fortunately, this explanation can help in dealing with the fear of the dark better as you can be more specific with your child:

Helping A 4-Year-Old Who Is Afraid Of The Dark

With a 4-year-old who becomes scared of the dark, being proactive in combating their fear can help.

Let your 4-year-old choose a special nightlight or even a ceiling projector for their room, to let them have control of the darkness. 

You can also engage them in making a monster spray as I mentioned earlier. I have found this a very effective way of helping children of this age combat their fear. 

Allow your little one to choose the bottle and what goes into the spray and allow them to spray all the dark corners of the room, under the bed, inside the cupboards, etc to keep the monsters away.

It is important to use lots of positive reinforcement to encourage courage at night and praise your 4-year-old for overcoming their fears.

As with the other age groups offering comfort items, like a favorite stuffed animal, can also soothe them at bedtime and alleviate their fear of the dark.

Use books to help them understand they are not alone in their fear and talk to them during the day about their fears so that bedtime is not the main focus for these discussions.

Helping A 5-Year-Old Who Is Afraid Of The Dark

By the time your child is five years old, you may notice that they express their fear of the dark through anger or frustration as well as becoming visibly upset.

Despite this, it is still important to continue to be patient and understanding.

A plan that includes gradually dimming the lights over time might help them adjust to the dark more comfortably, but I would not force this. 

Continue to use a night light, the monster spray and talk about their fear of the dark during daylight hours.

I was once told a very successful story by a close friend about combating fear of the dark for 5-year-olds … where her son used a magic toy sword that he kept under his bed to protect him from any monsters. 

He never had to use it but just having it under his bed made him feel more secure.

If, despite all your best efforts, your child’s fear of the dark persists and is disrupting their ability to sleep, then consider a visit to the pediatrician to rule out any underlying issues.

Encouraging your child to seek help when they have a problem is a great life lesson and this is just another part of growing up and learning how to face various challenges.

Looking to get your little one to sleep quickly and effortlessly? Check out my Bedtime and Nap Cheat Sheet and master the art of making daytime naps and bedtimes as seamless as possible.

When Does A Fear Of The Dark Typically Start And End?

The onset of fear of the dark usually emerges in children around 2 years old. It can persist through the preschool years up to age 6. 

But, to be honest, I have known children up to the age of 12 who have fears of the dark and want a light left on in the corridor or the bedroom door open.

This is completely normal too.

No matter how and when it occurs you will need to remain patient and supportive. Fears (no matter whether they’re real or imagined) are scary and can cause your child a great deal of stress.

Can You Prevent A Fear Of The Dark?

A toddler’s fear of the dark is often a natural phase, tied to their active imagination making it very hard to prevent. 

And while you cannot categorically prevent your little one from developing a fear of the dark… there are lots of things you can do to help your child through this tricky phase:

Toddler Nightmares Featured Image

Frequently Asked Questions About Toddlers Who Are Afraid Of The Dark

This section addresses some of the most common inquiries about toddlers and their fear of the dark.

Q: What are common signs that a toddler is afraid of the dark?

A: The most common signs your toddler is afraid of the dark include becoming more anxious as bedtime approaches, crying, clinging to you, or completely avoiding their bedroom when the lights are turned off. Some toddlers express their fear through actions, like attempting to turn the lights back on or asking for someone to stay with them. These behaviors are typical indicators that your toddler might be struggling with a fear of the dark.

Q: Is it normal for toddlers to be afraid of the dark?

A: Yes, it is very normal for toddlers to be afraid of the dark. Rest assured that with time and proper support, this fear typically diminishes. Helping your child feel secure during the night and understanding their fear can assist them in overcoming their fear of the dark gradually.

Q: Are night lights beneficial for toddlers who are scared of the dark?

A: Yes, night lights can be a helpful tool for toddlers who are scared of the dark. They provide a soft illumination that can reduce anxiety by allowing toddlers to see their surroundings. Having a small source of light can give your toddler the comfort they need to fall asleep more peacefully. Here is my favorite nightlight at the moment:

My Top Pick
Toddler Night Light Lamp By LICKLIP

Finding the right night light for your child can be quite a task. You want something safe, comforting, and practical. The Cozy Starry Night Light ticks these boxes, with eye-friendly warm lighting and an easy-to-use dimmer.

Its gentle glow makes it the best night light for feeding baby, diaper changes, or comforting your little one back to sleep.

As your baby grows the Cozy Starry Night Light's starry sky projection can provide comfort and gentle quiet time stimulation. Its soft lighting ensures a dreamy, peaceful environment, supporting your baby’s natural sleep cycle.

It really is a fantastic nightlight (at a very reasonable price!)

Pros:
  • Eye-friendly warm lighting with adjustable brightness.
  • Includes a timer function for convenience.
  • Projects a starry sky that is soothing for little ones.
  • Rechargeable battery, so it's very portable.
Cons:
  • A USB adapter is not included for charging.
  • The star projector is static without motion (however, this is ideal for very young babies and toddlers).
  • Battery life varies based on the brightness settings.
Buy Now
We earn a commission if you click this link and make a purchase at no additional cost to you.

Need More Parenting Help?

Author Image Bio
Paula McLaren is the founder of Teething to Tantrums and a highly qualified childcare expert with over 40 years of experience as a Norland Nanny. She holds a BA (Hons) in Early Years Development & Learning (0-6 Years) and the prestigious Norland Diploma. Paula has worked as a night nanny, run a successful daycare center in London, and helped raise countless children using her tried and tested developmental and guidance methods.

Keep Reading